The war on masculinity continues…

CoverGirl just hired its first cover boy, James Charles, a 17-year-old who just became the brand’s first “male” ambassador. The announcement was tweeted over social media introducing James as a “makeup artist, boundary breaker, and the newest CoverGirl with hashtag #COVERGIRLJames.

Instead of society hitting the pause button and shouting out, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute!!!”…it’s applauding the cosmetics giant CoverGirl for hiring makeup artist James Charles as its new “cover boy”. Our “progressive modern” culture shouts out through a megaphone that men are barbaric dumb oppressors of women. This culture is also empowering women to be independent in the workplace and at home without the need for men at all. Because men are becoming more passive to their God given roles and giving into societal narratives, it’s having devastating effects on boys — men are left searching for their place in society and boys don’t know where to turn.

I don’t see this as “boundary breaking” at all. There are so many thoughts swirling around in my head right now, but I want unpack some of them as I feel they are very important in the conversation of today’s culture.

One has to wonder, are we still making men?

Well, according to our daily dose from the main stream media, TV/movies, colleges and talking heads such as New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd…who quipped “men are so last century” during the November 2013 Munk Debate – doesn’t seem like it.

Growing up in the 80’s, people generally understood what “being a man” was supposed to be and society expected boys to become one. I (and many others) take a more traditional perspective on what a man is: someone who takes responsibility for others; such as his family, his community and his country and himself. A man stands for ideals and values higher than himself and conducts himself with integrity. Oh, and doesn’t wear makeup and dresses.

Do I get angry when I see a boy on the cover of CoverGirl? I do, but it makes me more sad than anything. I don’t know why we are so confused about this when God puts solid ground beneath our feet on the matter. For example, Mark 10:6 states “But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female!” Society as a whole seems to have lost the idea that boys are supposed to grow up to become men.

Denny Burk, Professor of Biblical Studies at Boyce College, shares this: “The spirit of the age tells us that gender is nothing more than a social construct — a set of behavioral patterns and tendencies that we absorb from our culture and upbringing. In this way of thinking, gender norms are arbitrary and fluid. Thus to raise a little boy to be a little boy can be cruel and abusive if that little boy wishes to behave like a girl. Gender is a choose-your-own-adventure story, and the parent’s job is to get out of the way and let it happen….In the biblical view, every single person is created in the image of God. God did not make us into undifferentiated genderless automatons.”

Here are some of my thoughts.

1) There is a serious vacancy of adult males raising boys than ever before. Too many boys these days are not raised by their father and don’t have a solid male role model to teach them how to become a man. There is a fatherlessness epidemic.

2) Masculinity and femininity, as intended from God’s original design, have been put on the endangered list. Because of the rise of feminism, feminist teach that male and female are essentially the same and an untold number of boys are being raised as if they are no different than girls. Don’t take my word on the matter…just Google it. Society is banning masculine toys such as trucks, play guns and toy soldiers, and male forms of play like good ole roughhousing. Most schools won’t even let boys play dodge ball during gym for risk of being hurt. Not suggesting that playing with trucks, toy guns/soldiers defines you as a boy…just examples of the war on masculinity.

3) The “distinctive roles” of men is quickly fading into the sunset and going the way of the dodo bird. Men thrive in an environment where they are relied upon and they feel most needed when they do something uniquely different from women. We see this playing out in the military, sports and in schools were masculine pronouns are becoming neutered.

4) The new “cultural norm” of society is oriented more on a “rights” centered perspective versus a “responsibility” centered perspective. Mixed in with society’s constant emphasis on material possessions and self…this “rights” centered” perspective cripples a boy on his journey into manhood. Responsibility is at the core of men! John Eldredge points this out so eloquently, “A man must have a battle to fight, a great mission to his life that involves and yet transcends even home and family. He must have a cause to which he is devoted even unto death, for this is written into the fabric of his being.”

I could keep going, but you get the idea.

During the last few decades our culture has redefined the meaning and responsibilities of men and women in society and in the home. Many men have become emasculated, confused and insecure. With this new narrative taking a firm grip on society, men don’t know how to step up and lead the home anymore. Growing up, most men lacked a good role model for leadership at home and don’t have a clue of what it means to lead a family.

I’m sure this article is starting to bother some and I am ready to be called everything under sun, but let me be clear that this world is searching for authentic men and I refuse to let anyone take my man card or trample on authentic manhood!

So, how do we respond to this?

As I shared in a my article on Bruce Jenner…if the love of God is not for these confused boys, it is for no one. As followers of Jesus Christ, making fun of, mocking or insulting them does not make room for sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ in their lives. These responses are not characteristic of Jesus Christ and shouldn’t be characteristic of those who follow Him! Remember, we don’t have to fully understand or condone someone’s choice to love them.

We need to stand for God’s good and original design as Jesus makes clear in Mark 10:6, “But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female.” Our lives are part of God’s creative act, not some self-willed post modern cultural labels of society.

We need to step up and become men (of course this is a call for men), because the world is craving for authentic men and our families desperately need leadership in the home. Men, they are looking for you to step up and man up! …and just to be clear, this is not a call to be macho or a lunk head. It’s a call for men to be strengthened in their inner core, in their souls, in their character, in their integrity and in their fidelity to the truth of the Living God.

When boys don’t become men, women take on their roles…and the ones I talk to are not happy doing this. This societal vacuum is creating a vicious cycle — men stop being men; women become “man-like”; men retreat further from their role as a man; and women get more disenfranchised. The hard truth is…women make lousy men and men make lousy women. The sooner everyone figures this out, the better off society will be.