Unfortunately we live in a time where the “accepted normal” is kids having to grow up in a fractured family due to divorce or without fathers who are active in their lives and often the heavy lifting is unfairly burdened on the mothers. The other unintended consequence of this trend is the dilemma of weak or emasculated men reaching epidemic proportions in society…where many are asking, “where have all the men gone?”
Because of this, I’ve noticed that mothers are becoming more over protective and controlling of their sons, which is causing significant tension when it comes time for them to stretch their wings and leave the nest. The other dynamic that’s rearing its ugly head is these sons are finding it harder to cleave to their wives and step up to lead in their homes. Too often I talk to men who cannot make decisions for themselves or their families, have no real direction or plan for their life, choose a path of passivity and are paralyzed of their future. They are carrying a broken compass and have absolutely no mission in life!
When you dig deeper into these issues, you can often connect the dots to not having a fully present father figure in their lives and/or a mother who never allowed her son the opportunity to stop being her “little boy”. Of course a mother’s efforts are well intended, but they unknowingly stand in the way of their son’s father (or father figure) ability to provide a path for them to become men by keeping their “little boys” under their constant protection and control.
To all the mothers out there who doing much of the heavy lifting these days…
