As parents we all face that moment where we should have the conversation about sex with our kids. Remember if you’re not having the conversation with you’re kids, someone else is and the best place for a child to learn about sexuality is at home from those who care most about them. As a single dad, the conversation with my daughter was a bit more challenging. Where to begin that conversation was the tough part. Any single dad’s out there know what I’m talking about?

Struggling how to even approach the subject, someone recommended a book to me called, “Every Young Woman’s Battle: Guarding Your Mind, Heart, and Body in a Sex-Saturated World”. I read the book first and then gave a copy to my daughter to read when she started Junior High School. This article focuses on daughters, but there is a similar book for sons called, you guessed it, “Every Young Man’s Battle”.

Now, is this the silver bullet dad’s are looking for?

Not at all, but that shouldn’t deter you from having the conversation. Having a dialog with your daughter and providing tools such as this book are important. Here is the good news…even if your daughter has protected herself emotionally and sexually, feel that she’s been robbed of your purity, or is struggling with peer pressure/temptation in some way, this book can help her with sexual integrity. Something is better than nothing and you might be an integral part of helping your daughter live her life to the fullest — without regrets.

So I got the book, had the courage to start the conversation, but wanted take it a step further because it’s too easy to say to our kids “don’t do” something. So after some time in prayer I came up with a pretty neat idea – I sent her a letter from her Heavenly Father. I know there are some reading this that may have a tough time that I took some license in penning this letter, but I am asking you to just get past that for a minute and read it. Also, the other dimension in the letter was the pain of divorce she was struggling with.

My dear precious child,

I remember that day in history when time stood still and I was hanging on that cross. Through the pain of what I had to do that day, I did it for you. I looked through time and space and saw the day that I created you and formed you in your mother’s womb. I saw the day you were born and every detail of your life and it brought joy to Me because I love you so much.

Where do I begin?

You have been through so much and there’s so much I want to say to make it easier for you, but remember this…I promised you that I would never leave you nor forsake you. I have been with you through all the good times and tough times of your life.

I give you hope that tomorrow is on its way.

Do you believe that I so much want to take your painful memories?

I know that there are days where you want to run away from it all because you cannot see tomorrow and the pain is too much hold on to. Give Me all your pain. I am here with you and everything is going to be ok.

My sweet child let Me wipe away your tears, and give you life! Let Me make you feel beautiful again!

Don’t throw it all away…I’m here tonight, to take away your pain!

Yesterday is gone and if you believe in Me, everything that made you cry will fall to the ground. I’m here to bring you home; back into My warm embrace.

Remember that no matter what you do…I will always take you back into My arms. You haven’t let Me down and you never will. I will always love you!

Your friends are giving themselves away before marriage. They are trying to wash away their pain by drinking or pushing it down deep with drugs or starving themselves to convince themselves that somehow this will make them more beautiful. This brings tears of sorrow to My eyes.

Your worth does not come from your body, your mind, your work, your friends, what you put out, what you have or how much money you have. Your worth does not come from whether or not you have a boyfriend in your life. Your worth does not come from whether or not other boys notice you. You have immeasurable worth that comes from Me, your Creator!

As we journey through life together, you will be tempted in a million different ways not to believe this. This is a temptation and a lie that will attempt to make you to go searching for your worth and identity everywhere else other than Me your Creator.

You don’t have to give yourself away to earn love from another. You’re better than that. You’re already loved!

Remember, you are so worth it all and I love you so very much…I died for you! You were worth dying for on the cross!

And when you’re feeling all alone and you can’t go on, remember that I am here. And when you think you’ve gone too far with anything, I will run to you and meet you where you are! Just reach for Me! My arms are always open wide for you!

Don’t throw it all away! I’m here tonight, to take away your pain!

I love you more than you could ever imagine! My love for you is deeper than the sky and wider than the oceans. If you only knew how much I love you!

I will always love you FOREVER!

Your God, your Creator, your best friend,
Jesus

Still think its not a bad idea to get a t-shirt on the rules for dating your daughter, but spend the time to give her the tools to set her up for success. And remember dads, also be there for her if she stumbles along the way.

Whether your a single dad, a single mom or a married couple…take the time to have the conversation about sex with your kids. Don’t let someone else be that voice!