God is so good, but I allowed the culture and the lies of the world to dull my senses and blind me over time so I almost missed seeing His goodness. I foolishly took my eyes off Him and became intoxicated by people in high places, envying the success of those who have made it to the top and desperately seeking this to define my own identity. I believed that these people worried about nothing, and their status and wealth provided them with the comfort of not having a care in the world.
What I couldn’t see beneath the veil was their conceit and arrogance, how selfish they were at the core, their uncaring hearts, their aggressively doing whatever it took for them to get what they wanted with no regard for others, their evil conceit that knew no limits, their being friendly to your face and mocking you to others behind your back. In their arrogance, they would threaten oppression and destroy the peace. People actually listened to them — I actually listened to them — can you believe it?
What’s going on? God, where are You? Can’t You see what’s going on down here? God, why do I suffer though I live for You? Why do those who deny You have it better than I do? Everywhere I looked I felt the sorrow and the pain of empty living. This is giving me a headache…
In the blink of an eye, disaster! Reaching the end of myself through crisis, I ran into the loving arms of God and He began to show me the whole picture: searching for love, I continued to reach out for the things that kept destroying me. A blind curve on a dark road — a living nightmare! I would wake up and see nothing — nothing! I am so sick of envying the lives of so many I see, somehow believing that they have what I need. I spent my life focusing on a score that I could never win.
Lord, please cover my eyes so that my heart can finally see that when it’s all said and done, You are the only thing that means anything. God, You are enough for me! Lord, how refreshing it is to be in Your presence. God, I am coming home to You and telling the world what You did for me.
My heart may fail, but the Lord is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
He is my heartstone!
